Sympathy flowers in Wilmington

Church services here carry their own conventions, and the downtown congregations are old enough that the buildings themselves shape what fits. St. James Episcopal, whose parish dates to 1729, and First Presbyterian on South Third — where Woodrow Wilson's father was pastor while Wilson spent his teenage years in the city — both run formal services in narrow historic sanctuaries where a compact pedestal arrangement works and an oversized easel spray does not. The Basilica Shrine of St. Mary on Ann Street, the Guastavino-built Catholic church elevated to a minor basilica, follows Catholic funeral Mass practice: flowers are welcome, and the parish staff will tell you where they go relative to the casket or urn. First Baptist on Market Street, St. Stephen AME on Red Cross Street — a congregation built by freedmen and one of the anchors of Black Wilmington — and the Baptist, AME and non-denominational churches out through Winter Park, Castle Hayne, Leland and Navassa all accept deliveries at the church office during the week, though an office may be unstaffed on the day of a Saturday service, which is a good reason to send to the funeral home instead. For Wilmington's Jewish families, the Temple of Israel on South Fourth Street — built in 1876 and the oldest Jewish house of worship in North Carolina — and B'nai Israel follow the practice that flowers are not the customary gesture at the service; a plant or a fruit arrangement sent to the shiva home afterward, or a donation in the person's memory, is what tradition asks for, and the shops here know that distinction without being coached.